Mary and Martha, Leukemia, Women and the Priesthood and the End of the Story

I am LDS, a Mormon, a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

My husband died of Acute Myeloid Leukemia.  My seventeen year old son went through tremendous pain while he underwent three hours in an operating room, having his hip bones punctured 200 times, to provide enough bone marrow for a new type of bone marrow transplant to save his father’s life.   It worked; for ten months.   My husband died of Acute Myeloid Leukemia.   Many people asked me, why does God take the good ones?  People told me what a great teacher my husband was.  They told me he had changed their lives by what he had taught them.  My husband was the love of my life.  He was a great teacher.  He was generous, loving, kind and always had the best interest of the other person in mind, especially in my case, and he taught me how to confident, how to gain better understanding of our time here on earth.  He taught me how to search, ask, pray and gain the answers I needed to gospel and life questions.  He taught me hard questions are good questions.  He taught me how to teach.

My husband talked a lot about knowing, and not knowing, the end of the story.  One of his favorite examples of this was the story of Lazarus, Mary and Martha.  While we are fortunate, when we read this story, we know the end of that story.  While Mary and Martha waited for Christ to come to heal Lazarus they had faith.  They both knew that he could heal Lazarus, but they waited and waited.  Christ knew they were waiting.  He knew how much pain they were in but yet he still did not come.  He made them wait.  Even in their waiting for Christ to come and heal Lazarus they did not lose their faith.  They did not turn their backs on Christ or question who he was.  Mary and Martha were just desperately sad; they may have even felt let down by the Savior, because, in the waiting, Lazarus died.  In the waiting, Lazarus lay dead for days.  Mary and Martha felt, what we who now lose feel; grief.  When Christ finally came, to them, Mary and Martha felt that all hope was lost to those who loved Lazarus so dearly.  They told Christ he arrived too late.  Lazarus was gone.  What anguish Christ felt for Mary and Martha while they waited and ultimately lost hope in Christ arriving in time to save Lazarus from death.  Even though Christ knew what was to take place he wept with them.  I believe he wept because he literally knew their pain and felt it.  Christ, however, knew Mary and Martha needed this trial.  He knew that they, and the world, needed to learn, while being wrapped in his robe of love, which is righteousness, that through him and only him, we can and will conquer all; even death.

How lucky we are to have the end of that story.  Our life here, on earth now, is just the same as Mary's and Martha's was then.  We don't know the end of the story of our trials; our losses.   We don't know whether a loved one will be healed or taken home.  We don't know why we have lost a job or not gotten the job we want.  We don't know why our hearts have been broken by a girl, or boy.  We don't understand why we have the particular trials we signed up for.  …and sometimes we don’t know why we don’t get the answer to the hard question.   We do know, however, if we are patient, if we have faith, no matter what trials, losses, or our own missteps get in out path, wrapped in Christ's robe of love, turning our hearts to him every day, remembering him, we too, through him and his atonement, will conquer all; even death.

What does this have to do with what is going on now with the hard questions being asked about women and the priesthood?  Everything!

I could explain how I feel about it; but in so doing it would only be speculation.

I do know this, however; just as we as parents treat our children individually, because they are all different.  So does the Lord.  This doesn’t mean it isn’t fair or equal.  This doesn’t mean one is less and one is more.

As women we are given the priesthood when we enter the temple.  As women, in general, we are in tune to personal revelation more naturally than our counterpart.  We accept the responsibility of family, nurturing, and acceptance of the Lord more readily.  This is not saying we a more, it is saying we are different.

Men need tasks, assigned responsibility, a physical connection to the Savior, while we are here on this beautiful earth.   This, in my opinion, is what grounds them to the gospel.  This administrative role, if you will, gives them what we as women have innately.  This is not saying men or more, it is saying we are different.

I don’t have answers to the hard questions.  Really, there is only one hard question we ask as humans; that question is, “Why?”   Let’s start asking, ”Why not?”  Instead of asking, “Why am I a deprived of something, why did I lose someone, why are my trials so much harder, why isn’t this fair?”; maybe we should start asking why shouldn’t we be the ones with the trial, loss, unfairness, or tormenting hard questions, rather than another.  If we turn our hearts to the Savior and just ask for help, faith and peace through our trials, losses, hard questions, we will be given the peace we need.  We will know the end of the story in the Lord’s time and not ours.  We will have peace and joy in the waiting.

Don’t lose faith sisters.  The Lord knows the end of the story, and ultimately so do we, and that is all that matters.

Until then be, humble, teachable, pray and above all love.

Kim Conley, the proud mom of, meginprogress.com.