I am LDS, a Mormon, a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
My husband died of Acute Myeloid Leukemia. My seventeen year old son went through tremendous
pain while he underwent three hours in an operating room, having his hip bones
punctured 200 times, to provide enough bone marrow for a new type of bone marrow
transplant to save his father’s life. It worked; for ten months. My
husband died of Acute Myeloid Leukemia. Many people asked me, why does God take the
good ones? People told me what a great
teacher my husband was. They told me he
had changed their lives by what he had taught them. My husband was the love of my life. He was a great teacher. He was generous, loving, kind and always had
the best interest of the other person in mind, especially in my case, and he
taught me how to confident, how to gain better understanding of our time here
on earth. He taught me how to search, ask,
pray and gain the answers I needed to gospel and life questions. He taught me hard questions are good
questions. He taught me how to teach.
My husband talked a lot about knowing, and not knowing, the
end of the story. One of his favorite
examples of this was the story of Lazarus, Mary and Martha. While we are fortunate, when we read this
story, we know the end of that story.
While Mary and Martha waited for Christ to come to heal Lazarus they had
faith. They both knew that he could heal
Lazarus, but they waited and waited.
Christ knew they were waiting. He
knew how much pain they were in but yet he still did not come. He made them wait. Even in their waiting for Christ to come and
heal Lazarus they did not lose their faith.
They did not turn their backs on Christ or question who he was. Mary and Martha were just desperately sad; they
may have even felt let down by the Savior, because, in the waiting, Lazarus
died. In the waiting, Lazarus lay dead
for days. Mary and Martha felt, what we
who now lose feel; grief. When Christ
finally came, to them, Mary and Martha felt that all hope was lost to those who
loved Lazarus so dearly. They told
Christ he arrived too late. Lazarus was
gone. What anguish Christ felt for Mary
and Martha while they waited and ultimately lost hope in Christ arriving in
time to save Lazarus from death. Even
though Christ knew what was to take place he wept with them. I believe he wept because he literally knew
their pain and felt it. Christ, however,
knew Mary and Martha needed this trial.
He knew that they, and the world, needed to learn, while being wrapped
in his robe of love, which is righteousness, that through him and only him, we
can and will conquer all; even death.
How lucky we are to have the end of that story. Our life here, on earth now, is just the same
as Mary's and Martha's was then. We
don't know the end of the story of our trials; our losses. We don't know whether a loved one will be
healed or taken home. We don't know why
we have lost a job or not gotten the job we want. We don't know why our hearts have been broken
by a girl, or boy. We don't understand
why we have the particular trials we signed up for. …and sometimes we don’t know why we don’t get
the answer to the hard question. We do know, however, if we are patient, if we
have faith, no matter what trials, losses, or our own missteps get in out path,
wrapped in Christ's robe of love, turning our hearts to him every day,
remembering him, we too, through him and his atonement, will conquer all; even
death.
What does this have to do with what is going on now with the
hard questions being asked about women and the priesthood? Everything!
I could explain how I feel about it; but in so doing it
would only be speculation.
I do know this, however; just as we as parents treat our
children individually, because they are all different. So does the Lord. This doesn’t mean it isn’t fair or
equal. This doesn’t mean one is less and
one is more.
As women we are given the priesthood when we enter the
temple. As women, in general, we are in
tune to personal revelation more naturally than our counterpart. We accept the responsibility of family,
nurturing, and acceptance of the Lord more readily. This is not saying we a more, it is saying we
are different.
Men need tasks, assigned responsibility, a physical
connection to the Savior, while we are here on this beautiful earth. This, in my opinion, is what grounds them to
the gospel. This administrative role, if
you will, gives them what we as women have innately. This is not saying men or more, it is saying
we are different.
I don’t have answers to the hard questions. Really, there is only one hard question we
ask as humans; that question is, “Why?” Let’s start asking, ”Why not?” Instead of asking, “Why am I a deprived of
something, why did I lose someone, why are my trials so much harder, why isn’t
this fair?”; maybe we should start asking why shouldn’t we be the ones with the
trial, loss, unfairness, or tormenting hard questions, rather than
another. If we turn our hearts to the
Savior and just ask for help, faith and peace through our trials, losses, hard
questions, we will be given the peace we need.
We will know the end of the story in the Lord’s time and not ours. We will have peace and joy in the waiting.
Don’t lose faith sisters.
The Lord knows the end of the story, and ultimately so do we, and that
is all that matters.
Until then be, humble, teachable, pray and above all love.
Kim Conley, the proud mom of, meginprogress.com.